I am busy right now. I am IN LOVE with a man. Who would have thought in THIS ECONOMY! I’ve been slacking on my writing because of it, though you don’t seem too disappointed.

I put a new hair curling technique in my hair overnight, and this morning I look like a 50s schoolgirl. This is a good reason to wear a hat today.

Life lately

The man in my life is so great. I gush like a little girl, and I know he’s wonderful like a grown woman. I told him that if this doesn’t work out, I’m gonna go be a nun, and I’m not kidding. All desire is the desire for God, and my heart only seeks a good, real love. Either way, I’ll marry love, but I think one will be more fun than the other.

Work at the hat shop is picking up too. I’m finally learning how to shape hats. Honestly, I thought it would be easy, and it’s not. My thumbs are newly callused from straw hats. It’s the end of the season, so we’re trying to get the rest of the straw out. I like the job a lot. Three events are lined up over the next month, and I get to see Montana through this little Western industry.

On the art side, I’m behind. A website to launch, fans to finish, photography to organize, zines to publish, prints to drop. I want to do it all, but golly, a handsome man and money flowing in elsewhere sure does distract you. How do I be more disciplined? How do I carve time out? Life will always be like this, overflowing, competing, so the question becomes: how do I change to get what I want?

The dual sport

I was reminded of this yesterday when I took my bike in. I was supposed to change the oil at 600 miles; I’m at about 1000. The Yamaha dealer in town quoted me $150 and wanted the TW200 for a week. Absurd. So I’ll learn how to do it myself. I’ll take the opportunity to know more about what I’m riding. And, that’s really what all of life is about too: taking stock, learning the machine, tuning what’s off.

In life, some areas surge forward; others limp behind. Maybe you’ve got an A+ job, money flowing on time. Maybe your spiritual life is rich. You’re in church, in scripture, with friends who speak about God. But your love life feels like a C. Not failing, but dragging. You’re disappointed, and that’s good. From disappointment, we can see where desire is. We can see where we have an opportunity to grow.

Because one of the first ingredients needed for growth is simply dissatisfaction. Disappointment. That’s desire. Desire doesn’t always just feel good. It’s where we feel we want more, and we might even be down about how to get it.

The wheel of life

And, this is where I start to visualize (I’m a visual learner). The Wheel of Life comes to mind. On the surface, it’s a freshman coaching tool. They use it everywhere someone says I’m not happy. Okay great, let’s look at why.

The idea is simple: draw the circle, label the slices, mark where you’re satisfied like a dart to a bullseye.

But, the generic version of these wheels is shallow. It’s a bureaucrat’s idea of a good life. Health & Fitness. Career. Family.

But the wheel. A wheel. THE WHEELS. Are a really important and sacred map for wholeness. Think about the places we see wheels. Every tradition has its wheels. Mandalas, the Celtic Ouroboros (my favorite). The Buddhists have the Wheel of Samsara: birth, death, rebirth, the endless cycles we’re meant to wake up from. Jung called it individuation: the slow turning inward until we meet the Self at the center. Even the zodiac is a wheel. Twelve houses circling the heavens, twelve archetypes we all move through in our lives. Christians have their own version, too, and its incredibly mystical. The "Ophanim", the wheel of the divine chariot, which brought (my favorite little medieval guys in paintings) the cherubim to Ezekiel.

The wheel keeps showing up because it’s the oldest language we have for wholeness. A circle can’t be lopsided. The moment one spoke grows too heavy, the whole thing wobbles. That’s why the Wheel of Life, a silly yet powerful template, actually works to create change. It’s not a self-help gimmick, it’s the geometry that reminds us of what our soul already knows: you can’t be only successful at work and malnourished in love. You can’t be spiritually awake and physically depleted. You can’t be healthy in body and yet starved of purpose. The circle won’t turn.

A map of wholeness.

But, what if you drew your own? What if instead of “Fitness” you wrote “Body as Temple”? Instead of “Romance,” you wrote “Union”? Instead of “Career” you wrote “Calling”? Then the wheel isn’t just productivity defined by modern life. It's esoteric geometry looking at your life in lifetimes.

Because when I look at my own wheel, I have to add: “Art Making”, “Body I Want”, “Intuition”, “Play”, “Spiritual Education”, “Creative Flow”, and “Business”. Because when I look at my own wheel, I don’t just ask: is my health a “7” and my finances a “9”? I ask: where is the soul pointing me next? Where am I disappointed, generally? Where do my desires want to go but can’t? Where am I being asked to surrender? To strengthen? To rebalance?

And, the wheel I use today to take stock of my life might look different in 5 years.

Great, that’s good. The wheel is alive, and in every season of life it turns.

So that’s my call for you today. Make your own wheel of life. Take a piece of paper, draw a circle. Pie slice it up. Write categories no one else would think to write. “Devotion.” “Play.” “Silence.” “Beauty.” “Union.”

If you do, you’ll start to see that the wheel isn’t measuring your life, it’s spinning your unique prayer, your unique design, and destiny. Every imbalance is just an invitation back to the center.

Life isn’t about working with the categories handed to you, but with the ones your spirit longs for. I’m reminded today of the way the wheel is a compass for your life.

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Love,
Val

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